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So Where Do I Go For A Tune-Up?

by Susan Farrell

Ever feel like your body has one of those timing systems like the new cars have where a light goes off when you hit a certain mileage?

I remember teasing my sister, who is nine years older than me, about her age. She tried to warn me about turning 30. In my know-it-all youth, I of course laughed about her warnings, and knew it wouldn't happen to me ...

So I turned 30. And sure enough... the first warning light went off... sort of like that 30,000 mile warranty light that warns you to get a tune-up. The weight suddenly started clinging harder to my hips and it wasn't so easy to just diet for a week and lose it. Things started to bulge where they didn't before, and I had to admit maybe that my sister had a point ...

So I adjusted and resolved to work out a bit more. And actually I think I went through some of my best years mentally and emotionally between the ages of 30 and 35... thank goodness, since I know it wasn't the best for me physically!

Then I 35 hit last month. I think my sister failed to mention that there were other warranty warning lights like the cars have. At 35, that second tune-up warning hit. That nice slim waist I'd had for 34 years suddenly bloated out. And it, similar to the hips-thighs-and-upper-arm rebellion of age 30, isn't cooperating with my attempts to lose the excess as easily as it once did.

And what's with the digestive tract rebellion? I never had a problem in my life with my digestive system or embarrassing gurgles, bubbles, and the resulting bodily sound effects (to put it "nicely") before 35. I always thought Mylanta, Alka Selzer and Correctol were for the "old folks." I'm going to now have to redefine that age group. I'm almost afraid to go to a bar and have a beer for fear that I may win one of those belching contests without even trying! And thank goodness for private bathrooms where you aren't afraid to relax for fear of what everyone else in other stalls can hear ...

So if my body is like one of those new cars with it's warning lights, just where do I go for a tune-up? I can't afford nor am I willing to subject myself to a plastic surgeon, exercising already to keep healthy and eating better, and the doctor says I'm in pretty good shape actually, nothing major to worry about, just maybe need a little routine maintenance work like a mammogram and cholesterol test. I think I'm doing all right actually. I'm adjusting to life, changing my diet, redefining my definitions and self-confidence and increasing my level of intentional activity (exercising). But now I'm almost afraid to wonder what will happen at 40 ... and on ...

But along with my age, I've gained the knowledge that life's too short to spend worrying or being negative about things. You've got to learn to roll with the punches, make lemonade out of those lemons, and adapt and make the best of things.

So how much is first prize in that belching contest after all?

Susan Farrell is the single mother of two teenagers. Her many hobbies include writing, reading, gardening, cooking, traveling and camping, and trying new things with her children. Her motto: "Live, love, laugh." Life's just too short not to.