How Many Frogs Do You Have To Kiss?

by Mitzi Bryant

So you licked all the wounds from the divorce, gotten used to the idea of being a Single Mom, so what's next? For some of us, the very idea of a man in our life continues to be repulsive for years to come. I'm one of the hopeful romantics, however, and that just meant one thing - dating.

Armed with the encouragement of friends and family, a new hairstyle, and 35 fewer pounds, I made the decision that I was ready to date. A momentous decision, fraught with much discussion regarding my emotional and mental readiness. Once the decision was made, however, I was pleased. So...

I waited.

Eventually, it occurred to me that Mr. Right must not know my street address or phone number, because he wasn't appearing on my doorstep as planned (with trust fund and Mercedes in tow). It had been 16 years since I'd dated - just how was this done?

I was no longer in school, disco was dead, I work among family, and I had already decided I was the only single mother in the small town in which I live. So, I turned to the medium that became my lifeline after my divorce - the internet.

Guess where dating now occurs? There are personal ads, chatrooms and dating services for every age, race, sexual orientation and lifestyle. You can virtually special-order Mr. Right from an endless spectrum of preferences. Personal ads are generally free of charge, and can be found just about anywhere. There are also paying services that offer specific matching of characteristics to produce the highest probability of relationship. The advantage of using a paid dating service, I found, is the lack of perverts. Perverts apparently have better things to do with their money.

Naïve romantic that I am, I dove right in.

Months later, the naïve romantic is now a cautious skeptic. I've learned more about the frailties of human nature than one woman should be exposed to in a lifetime. For example:

1. Many men consider themselves much better looking than they actually are.
2. A man who weighs approximately 400lbs has no qualms requesting his mate be petite and slim (which made me ponder whether he wanted a dinner companion, or dinner itself).
3. Most divorced men have a death wish in the form of skydiving, bungee jumping, rock climbing, motorcycling and hang gliding (or anything else the ex-wife told them they were stupid for wanting to do.)