Jugglers Workshop | All About Time
Juggling Workshop
Working Moms' Q & A
The daily tug-of-war between your career and your kids can leave you torn between the two worlds. Where do you turn? The Juggling Workshop! Ask questions and share suggestions about juggling work and family.
This month's question:
Before the birth of my son, I was selected for a job that is FABULOUS! I love what I do and believe I make a difference in people's lives. Since my son was born, I still love my job and can't envision ever being a stay at home parent. I love my child but I also love my job. How can I explain this to people who assume I would rather stay home than work?
-- Kellie
Kellie,
It's often hard for others, particularly those who are not working moms, to
understand that work can be a very important factor in a mother's life.
That doesn't mean she's a bad mother or that she doesn't love her child.
One woman I know who has three kids has been listening to her mother tell
her for years how sorry she is that her daughter has to work. She will
never understand that her daughter wants to work because she really likes
her job.
You can joke about it by telling people that you really are a much better
professional than you are a mother so your son is really better off being
cared for by others. Or you can simply tell them that you feel you are
making a difference by doing the work you do and that you are sure that your
son is getting enough of your love and attention to be thriving with the
life you're leading now.
As long as you're comfortable with your situation, don't worry about
everyone else. They'll either get it or they won't. Hope this helps.
Working together we can make a difference.
-- Cathy Feldman
As a mother of 3, I also feel the tug of work outside the home vs. stay-at-home.
I know that for me, I would lose all that I am as valued human being if I were forced to stay at home. That is just for me. Unfortunately, I did not realize this until after the 3rd child was born. I now have to wrestle with my children wanting to know why mommy works and daddy stays home!
It is very hard for them to understand that we have chosen to reverse our roles for the time being!
-- unsigned
I'm a very good professional. I'd like to think that
I'm also a good mother. What I'm not good at is the day-
to-day playtime/teaching that goes along with having a
toddler/preschooler. I've tried it, I didn't like it, my
daughter didn't like it. We're both much happier since
I have had a job I love and she's been spending her days
with people who actually like to do the same puzzle a
gazillion times and who let her do messy things every day,
sometimes twice a day. It's called division of labor, and
it's the basis of civilization. I still think I'm a good
mother. One of the things that makes me a good mother is
that I've found an arrangement that suits both our
personalities. So there.
-- Noa
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